Blue Skies

I've been bumming for a while now, however I know things are going to get better. I don't like change even when I know it's going to happen.... The pizza. The roommate. The movie last night. Good times. Kept me chill.

On days of gray
When doubt clouds my view
Its so hard to see past my fears.
My strength seems to fade
And its all I can do
To hold on, til the light reappears.
Still, I believe though some rains bound to fall
That you're here next to me.
And you're over it all.

The skys still blue
For my hope is in you
You're my joy
You're the dream thats still alive.
Like the wind at my back
And the sun on my face.
You are life
You're grace
You are blue skies.

Patience is a Virtue

I've had the worst "luck" these past couple of months. Jim and I are searching for our perfect condo, however everywhere we look leads us to a dead end. It has been a complete emotional roller coaster ride. We are on a deadline to an extent, so I would like to find a place in the time we have, although I'm coming to realize that it isn't my time that we are on. It's God's. Our times aren't matching which is even more frustrating.

For instance, I'll be talking to someone and they'll mention to me that they just bought a new house. I want to scream, "No! I'm the one looking not you!" It seems like everyone around me is getting my wish.

I will be the first to say how selfish this sounds, but get real: we are all selfish. We all want things. We all strive to get things. It's just a fact of life. However, as each day approaches us, I'm beginning to remember how we receive things in life. Prayer. Even though God works on his time, when we pray, we're coming to him for guidance, support and knowledge to lead us to which path to choose when we come to that fork in the road. We can always lean on that power of prayer to guide us to where we need to be in life.

We are really fortunate. We have a great place that we live in now that is in an excellent area in Beverly. We have food, clothes and jobs. And I can not express how grateful I am to have the necessities in life.

So, my dear readers, I'm asking you to pray for us. Please. We have come across disappointment after disappointment with a lot of personal situations in the last couple of months that has become very discouraging to me. It's been extremely hard to actually wake up and put a smile on my face everyday and act like nothing is wrong. I'm not one to spill out all my feelings to anyone either but what else can we do?

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Matthew 6.25

It's 9/11 Where were you?

Senior year of high school. I remember the morning being balmy, as the sun beated down on me as I walked from one campus building to the other in order to take our senior class picture. All 728 of us seated in the gymnasium. Sweet. I didn't have to sit through another English class with whats-his-name. He never remember my last name either, so we're even. I just had to go to Psychology class and then I was done for the day. Yay for early release!

By the time I reached psych. class the first plane had just hit the North Building. The words, "holy shit" unconsciously flew out of my mouth. We sat there stunned, in silence.

When I arrived home the North Building had just collapsed. "What do you mean it just collapsed?" I asked my mom who was sitting on the couch with my sister scrutinizing the television screen. For the rest of the day our eyes were glued to Aaron Brown as he reported every detail of September 11, 2001. For the weeks to come we listened to the eerie sound of silence as no planes flew over my parent's house.

The hours seemed like minutes, and yet the minutes have become seven years. Can you believe that? Seven years have gone by. Seven years since we entered the war with Iraq and I don't think the mourning process ceases to being close to over with our country. On the other hand, I was flabbergasted as I flipped through the channels this evening and saw next to nothing about this tragic event. Is it already a hush-hush ordeal? The next day we got word that our music director of our church had been killed. He was definitely an inspiration to us all.

This morning at work we didn't have our usual meeting. No papers were handed out about our LY numbers or our STD/WTD compared to other stores. "Remember how important today is." That's what they told us. I wish every meeting could be like that.

This is a day in our history that we are able to tell our children and our children's children what we were doing just like our grandmothers tell us where they were when Pearl Harbor was attacked or when Kennedy was shot. "Grocery shopping," is what mine says. It's good to remember.

Is Your Friendship For Sale?

When its 3 am and she's at your door
and she wants you back
and she's begging for forgiveness.
remember that
When your phone keeps ringing all night long
and that same old weakness gets so strong that you're helpless
remember that.

It doesn't matter how she hurts
you with her hands or with her words
you don't deserve it
it ain't worth it
take your heart and run.

Remember that...

Do No Worry

I received this story through an e-mail at work this afternoon and I literally got tears. From all the things that have been going on this past week, I really need to take a step back, breathe, and not worry, because everything happens in its own time.

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John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and
always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was
doing, he would reply, 'If I were any better, I would be twins!'

He was a natural motivator.

If an employee was having a bad day, John was there telling the employee how
to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up and asked
him, 'I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do
you do it?'

He replied, 'Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices
today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a
bad mood

I choose to be in a good mood.'

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can
choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. \

Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their
complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the
positive side of life.

'Yeah, right, it's not that easy,' I protested.

'Yes, it is,' he said. 'Life is all about choices. When you cut away all
the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to
situations. You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your
choice how you live your life.'

I reflected on what he said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to
start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I
made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident,
falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from
the hospital with rods placed in his back.

I saw him about six months after the accident.

When I asked him how he was, he replied, 'If I were any better, I'd be
twins...Wanna see my scars?'

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his
mind as the accident took place.

'The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my
soon-to-be born daughter,' he replied. 'Then, as I lay on the ground, I
remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or...I could
choose to die. I chose to live.'

'Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?' I asked

He continued, '..the paramedics were great.

They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into
the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I
got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed
to take action.'

'What did you do?' I asked.

'Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me,' said John.
'She asked if I was allergic to anything 'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and
nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and
yelled, 'Gravity'.'

Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Operate on me as
if I am alive, not dead.'

He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his
amazing attitude... I learned from him that every day we have the choice to
live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about
itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.' Matthew 6:34.

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

All Summer Long

Every summer has an infamous song that everyone is still humming as school starts again. Here's 2008's.