5.31.2008
Thoughts
5.28.2008
Loss
Pass me not, o gentle Savior
Hear my humble cry.
While on others thou art calling
Do not pass me by.
Savior, Savior, hear my humble cry
While on others thou art calling do not pass me by.
When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blessed assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
5.27.2008
Should've Would've Could've
Person A likes Person B
Person B starts to notice Person C.
Person A and C are completely oblivious to Person B's feelings.
OR
Person A gets offered a job at Destination B
Destination C offers more than Destination B.
Person A picks Destination C but always wonders how life would've turned out at Destination B.
Is this wrong? I mean, don't you think life is too short to just "what if" all the time?
I had a "what if" moment this past weekend. It was extremely off the charts when a friend brought up the whole ideal to me this morning without me even mentioning it to them. I'm not going to go into full detail about it either, "don't write anything you want the whole world to see" is what my grandmother always told me growing up and I still ably by that rule to this day especially when it comes to the Internet. Yes, sometimes I will slip up and just vent but most of the time I do keep a lot of things to myself. Maybe I'll tell a close friend but that's slim pickings too.
The question now is do I take my own advice and act on my thoughts or just let it rest? Someone once said,
"If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were."
Good call.
5.26.2008
How Great Thou Art
And when I think, that God, His Son not sparing;
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in;
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing,
He bled and died to take away my sin.
5.24.2008
5.21.2008
Team David!
5.14.2008
Line Dancing
This one was my all time favorite to dance to, and the first one I was introduced to by my uncle.
Yeah, heel, toe, docie doe come on baby let's go boot scootin
Cadilac black jack, baby meet me outback we're gonna boogie
Oh get down, turn around go to town boot scootin' boogie
5.13.2008
It's a Negative
I just want to thank everyone who has been giving me such great support this past week. Your words of affirmation, phone calls and hugs truly mean a lot. Inside I have been a complete basket case with this whole scenario by going off on catastrophic thoughts, but I can pretty much hide any emotion I have from the public. I know I really should start expressing my feelings, thoughts and opinions more often but I feel like it would be just a waist of time if no one would agree with them. Even the biggest thing like this I have showed no tears to anyone...except Jim. He's just a given. So, now you know: if I cry in front of you, you know you mean a lot to me.
Our vacation down in Florida has been going very smoothly. Jim and I went to Cocoa today. Visited Ron Jon's, I got burnt to a crisp and got up close and personal to those estranged wild fires that have been making national news. Florida is burning up good times. I95 was closed, however being a born Floridian I knew all the back roads that took us home from the beach. I went to a pilates class with Amber, my mom and sister tonight and Jim and I are meeting up with her tomorrow at Jessie's bar for some good ole line dancing! Yee-haw. Disney is in the works for Thursday. Oh boy.
On the contrary, my family is in the midst of forming a family reunion, (which my aunt and I have been trying to push for the past SIX years). A suggestion of taking a cruise over Turkey Day since it'll be my cousin's birthday was going around. I guess I should start putting my event planning skills to the test!
5.12.2008
You're a Heatbreaker
Sweet-talkin' forked tongue haf a temptin' charm.
Before I turned around, that boy was gone.
All I can say is: "Bartender, pour me somethin' strong."
Here's to the past, they can kiss my glass.
I hope he's happy with her.
Here's to the boy, who wrecked my world,
That angel who did me in.
I think the devil drives a Coupe de Ville.
I watched 'em drive away over the hill,
Not against his will, an' I've got time to kill,
Down in Brokenheartsville.
5.11.2008
Happy Mother's Day!
Have you called your mom yet? If not, grab your phone and start dialing! Even if she does not deserve the Mother of the Year Award every mother needs to know how much they are appreciated at least once a year. I mean, think about it, you would not be here if it wasn't for her.
But the child's mother said, "As surely as the Lord lives and as you live, I will not leave you," 2 Kings 4.30
I know, the picture is old, but it is always a goodie.
5.09.2008
My First MRI
Before any of the action started I was prescribed Valium in order to relax during the procedure. The assistant explained the step by step process to me as she handed me my hospital gown and robe. They would be taking eight pictures, six with the injection from my arm, two without.
I was told to lay on the MRI bed as the male nurse and assistant handed me a pillow for my head and my feet. They padded my sides with cushion and made sure my ear plugs were snug inside me.
The helmet came on and they slid me into the screening section. The noises were excruciating which made me really uncomfortable because I don't like loud noises to begin with. I don't even like the television volume to exceed the limit of five.
The whole procedure took about forty-five minutes to complete. The male nurse gave me my copy of the X-Rays to give to my neurologist during my follow up session with him. I should hear about the results by Tuesday at the latest.
So that was a snitch. I was scared. I still am. I'm more scared now to hear what the results are. Even if my doctor does find something to be a little disturbing and tells me to do another MRI I think I'll be more calm about it, (hopefully this won't happen). After all, you always remember your first.
5.07.2008
Enhancing My Vacabulary
5.05.2008
Revolutionary Randomness
Do you speed
How far away is work?
How often
Every
Who'
Do you give stran
Do you face your money
Do you put your money
Do you eat borri
What color
Ever prete
Did you know the sweet
Did you just swear
Have you ever named
Do you reall
What kind of compu
What is your favor
What is the last thing
Is your hair down or up? Up.
How many windo
Have you spoke
What would
Do you own any expen
Have you ever roast
What is the close
Who was the last perso
Have you ever been out of the count
Is a glass
Do you wear short
What color
Do you wear glass
What brand
What is the last phras
Do you prefe
Have you ever been in a weddi
How about
Does your showe
Where
Have you ever gone deep sea fishi
Do you own slipp
Would
Have you ever ran with sciss
Have you ever tried
Are you tickl
Are your toena
When Grandma Goes To Court
5.04.2008
I'm Scared
- I'm a girl.
- Family history
- Have anxiety
Then came the neurology tests: following the finger with only my eyes and without moving your head, the sobriety test which details a focus of touching my nose to his finger not by speed but by accuracy and walking in a straight line not only forwards, but backwards, on my tippy toes, and my heels.
Passed, passed, and passed. This wore me out. He then took out a gadget that tested my reflexes: the elbows, knees and the souls of my feet. I had to tell him if the gadget was hot or cold on both hands, and if it was sharp or dull on the bottom of my feet. Then he did the notorious hit to the knee.
This is where we found a problem. My reflexes on my right side are completely normal, however my reflexes on my left side are numb, or "don't match the same reaction as your right side." Coincidentally, this is how my migraines start; Left to right. Now that we have found the problem we need to fix it. He scheduled me for a MRI for this upcoming Friday.
I agreed even though I was feeling really uneasy by this point. He explained to me he wasn't trying to scare me but he also wasn't one of those doctors that just, "schedules this stuff. There's a problem on your left side. It could be leading up to hemorrhaging. I need to find out for sure."
Hemorrhaging. Wow. That's scary stuff. I mean, not to sound pessimistic but couldn't that lead to a stroke? Is a twenty-four year old capable of having a stroke? I always like to see the water half full so I'm not even going to consider thinking about that unless I absolutely have to. I'm going to take it one day at a time and see what the MRI finds. It could end up being absolutely nothing besides my paranoia. Besides, I have a full schedule of activities to keep my mind busy during the week. (No pun intended). Work, AM walks with Alissa, work, American Idol, work, LOST get together, and more work. I'll keep you updated.
Trust the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3.5-6
5.01.2008
Momzillas!
I couldn't imagine a bride that has to deal with an insane mother. I mean, get a life lady, you already had your day when dirt was new. This is your daughter's. I had this encounter tonight while I was working.
I only went in for four hours since I called out sick. I wasn't too worried about it because I have done overtime during this past week (but that's a totally different story for a different day). Anyway, as I was budgeting the numbers that we made yesterday for the first day of our Friends and Family event, I was approached by a MOB (mother of the bride) and an aunt. They explained to me that they had just driven from Burlington to purchase two goblets. Fantastic so far. Our computer showed that we had two, however we technically only had one for buying because the other one was the floor model. I explained to them under no circumstances I could sell the floor model. That's when all holy hell broke loose. The MOB said the shower was tomorrow and she had to get two goblets for a present. OK, this is when you want to scream, "idiot! your the bride's mom and your procrastinating until the last minute? How dare you!" But I didn't. They asked to speak to a manager, she said the same thing. We can't sell the model. They took our names and blah blah blah.
It was quiet in the store after they left and I was able to roughly listen to the new music the store is trying out. One song happened to be Hanson. I thought that was funny.
Everybody's looking for a blue sky
Searching for an answer on a satellite
I know that there's got to be a blue sky out there to see
A blue sky waiting for me
If you want to call that excitement go right ahead. It just boggles my mind how moms can be so neurotic about little things during their daughter's engagement. Making the day all about them. How selfish can one person get? I truly believe this is how the bride gets so stressed out. I keep thinking to myself how lucky I was to have a mom that was completely devoted to the wedding planning, however let me do the actions. She went with me as well as my sister and cousin (the maid of honor) to the taste testings, the appointments with the vendors, the reception sites, the wedding registry, and the dress shopping, (and I must point out I chose the 3rd dress I tried on). It was just hard core FUN! I had the final say with everything...if it was in the budget.
On another note, whatever music Aaron's playing is really cool. Good play list. Keep it real.
Being sick sucks but it's funny how Jim went around our room spraying Oust. Good times. Hopefully it won't last long because I'm really excited about our trip to Florida next weekend and I would appreciate it if my immune system could enjoy the vacation as well.