My dear Nephew, (I will not post your name due to confidentiality problems within the family),
I saw you for the first time today as you slept softly in your mom's arms. You looked so care-free. You're going to be a big boy. Already 9 lbs and 21 inches and still growing!
I've never been an aunt before, so I'm going to rely mostly on the influence that my aunts had on me throughout my life to give to you. First of all, your giving your parents a scare with your health at the moment. Get better! We want to spoil you. Spoil you in a way that you'll feel appreciated, and loved. I can not describe how honored I feel being your aunt, and the thoughts that are aimlessly running through my head, however this song explains it all and much more.
Love,
Auntie Erin.
I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
and each road leads you where you wanna go,
and if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
if it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile.
But more than anything, more than anything...
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back, but you never forget,
all the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
and you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
and always give more than you take.
But More than anything, yeah, more than anything...
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish. Yeah.
7.29.2007
7.27.2007
TGIF
:Sighs: It's finally Friday. Another hard week has been accomplished. Give me some Tequila because I know it's 5 o'clock somewhere.
Oh by the way, I'm an Auntie to Alexander Ryan Johnson. He was born on 7/27/07 at 3.52am. Weighing in close to 9 lbs. He's my big boy!!!
Oh by the way, I'm an Auntie to Alexander Ryan Johnson. He was born on 7/27/07 at 3.52am. Weighing in close to 9 lbs. He's my big boy!!!
7.26.2007
That's Sick
I'm sick. I hate being sick because I feel like I don't have time to be. I get so tired and worn out because my body is fighting off a virus. (I actually listened in 7th grade science class). I don't like going to the doctor's office because I feel like I will actually catch something worse while anxiously sitting in the waiting room. I'm feeling better as the has gone by. (Aaron, thank you for letting me have your Alka-Seltzer haha).
So here's the update on the baby news: Jim and I were already to go to VT early this morning when all of a sudden he gets a phone call from his mom saying they don't want us up there. Laura hates me. I was completely devastated. Aaron came home and just talked to me about it since Jim had to go to work. We watched a Japanese cartoon, saw David Elles for 2.5 seconds and then just walked up and down Bow St. at 10.30 at night. It made me feel better. On the other hand, I feel for Jim. This is his sister's first child and she doesn't even want her own brother there to experience it. Maybe it's me, and I'm not understanding her family values. However, we're going up to see the baby this Saturday. I feel like we shouldn't go at all. I mean, maybe I'm being a little selfish but I thought we were putting our differences aside and focusing on the new life that is being brought into this world. We have a present, a card and tons of love to give to our nephew, even though we STILL don't know his name. I'm going to take my mother's advice, she's most of the time she's always right and keep my head held high, and act like nothing is bothering me. I'm not going to let them get to me. Let them show their immaturity.
On a happier note, I have an interview for a Bridal Registry Consultant at Macy's on Monday. Yay!
So here's the update on the baby news: Jim and I were already to go to VT early this morning when all of a sudden he gets a phone call from his mom saying they don't want us up there. Laura hates me. I was completely devastated. Aaron came home and just talked to me about it since Jim had to go to work. We watched a Japanese cartoon, saw David Elles for 2.5 seconds and then just walked up and down Bow St. at 10.30 at night. It made me feel better. On the other hand, I feel for Jim. This is his sister's first child and she doesn't even want her own brother there to experience it. Maybe it's me, and I'm not understanding her family values. However, we're going up to see the baby this Saturday. I feel like we shouldn't go at all. I mean, maybe I'm being a little selfish but I thought we were putting our differences aside and focusing on the new life that is being brought into this world. We have a present, a card and tons of love to give to our nephew, even though we STILL don't know his name. I'm going to take my mother's advice, she's most of the time she's always right and keep my head held high, and act like nothing is bothering me. I'm not going to let them get to me. Let them show their immaturity.
On a happier note, I have an interview for a Bridal Registry Consultant at Macy's on Monday. Yay!
7.25.2007
Fun Times...
This is what I do when I'm bored...
1. Wheres your #1 on your top 8 at the moment?
At work.
2. What is your favorite possession?
My Ipod
3. Do you own a gun?
nah
4. If you could tell your last ex something what would you say?
I already had the last word.
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
Depending on which doctor.
6. What do you think of hot dogs?
I'm more of a hamburger person.
7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
All I want for Christmas by Mariah Carey
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
FRESH coffee
9. Can you do push ups?
Oh yea
10. Is your bathroom clean?
Always
11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?
My wedding ring.
12. Do you take painkillers?
Just did
13. What is your secret weapon to lure in the other sex?
I don't have to lure him. haha
14. Do you have A.D.D.? [Attention Deficit Disorder]?
Probably
15. Your name?
Erin
16. Middle Name(s)?
Jean
17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
1. I extremely dislike my in-laws
2. I have a huge headache
3. Aaron's animation thing was cool.
19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink:
1. Propel
2. vitamin water
3. iced coffee
20. Last movie you watched?
Does something on Lifetime count?
22. Current worry?
Being able to see my nephew.
23. Current hate?
In-laws.
24. Favorite place to be?
beach
25. How did you bring in the New Year?
My husband and I had opened some champainge and watched Ryan Seacrest in our new apartment.
27. Do you own slippers?
Yes.
30. Favorite color(s)?
Red, blue
31. Would you be a pirate?
Nah
32. Are you tired?
Yes
33. Do you sing in the shower?
rarely.
34. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
Aliens.
35. Current cravings?
Traveling
36. Superman, Spiderman, or Batman?
SPIDERMAN!!
37. Best bed sheets as a child?
Some doggie ones.
38. Worst injury you've ever had?
i dont know
39. What is your job?
Im currently, unemployed
40. Who is your most favorite person at the moment?
Faith
41. Who is your loudest friend?
I'm blessed with a lot of them.
42. Who is your most silent friend?
hmmm...
43. Do you like anyone right now?
I love someone.
44. Do you wish on shooting stars?
nah
45. What is your favorite book?
I like to read a lot.
46. Favorite candy?
sweedish fish
47. What song do you want played at your wedding?
I had Pacabel
48. What song do you want played at your funeral?
I want a black gospel chior clapping and singing "Amen"
49. What were you doing at 12AM last night?
Talking to Jim in bed.
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?
"I'm running late to go running with Alissa!"
1. Wheres your #1 on your top 8 at the moment?
At work.
2. What is your favorite possession?
My Ipod
3. Do you own a gun?
nah
4. If you could tell your last ex something what would you say?
I already had the last word.
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
Depending on which doctor.
6. What do you think of hot dogs?
I'm more of a hamburger person.
7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
All I want for Christmas by Mariah Carey
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
FRESH coffee
9. Can you do push ups?
Oh yea
10. Is your bathroom clean?
Always
11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?
My wedding ring.
12. Do you take painkillers?
Just did
13. What is your secret weapon to lure in the other sex?
I don't have to lure him. haha
14. Do you have A.D.D.? [Attention Deficit Disorder]?
Probably
15. Your name?
Erin
16. Middle Name(s)?
Jean
17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
1. I extremely dislike my in-laws
2. I have a huge headache
3. Aaron's animation thing was cool.
19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink:
1. Propel
2. vitamin water
3. iced coffee
20. Last movie you watched?
Does something on Lifetime count?
22. Current worry?
Being able to see my nephew.
23. Current hate?
In-laws.
24. Favorite place to be?
beach
25. How did you bring in the New Year?
My husband and I had opened some champainge and watched Ryan Seacrest in our new apartment.
27. Do you own slippers?
Yes.
30. Favorite color(s)?
Red, blue
31. Would you be a pirate?
Nah
32. Are you tired?
Yes
33. Do you sing in the shower?
rarely.
34. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
Aliens.
35. Current cravings?
Traveling
36. Superman, Spiderman, or Batman?
SPIDERMAN!!
37. Best bed sheets as a child?
Some doggie ones.
38. Worst injury you've ever had?
i dont know
39. What is your job?
Im currently, unemployed
40. Who is your most favorite person at the moment?
Faith
41. Who is your loudest friend?
I'm blessed with a lot of them.
42. Who is your most silent friend?
hmmm...
43. Do you like anyone right now?
I love someone.
44. Do you wish on shooting stars?
nah
45. What is your favorite book?
I like to read a lot.
46. Favorite candy?
sweedish fish
47. What song do you want played at your wedding?
I had Pacabel
48. What song do you want played at your funeral?
I want a black gospel chior clapping and singing "Amen"
49. What were you doing at 12AM last night?
Talking to Jim in bed.
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?
"I'm running late to go running with Alissa!"
BABY TIME!
My sister-in-law is in labor! Jim and I will be heading up to VT either tonight or early tomorrow morning. It's always so exciting to welcome a new life into this world. I've been thinking about it more and more over the past few weeks. We can pick our friends, but we can't pick our parents. I think our parents have more responsibility than we realize. Their reputation is on the line when we throw fusses in public, or get caught cutting class. People look more to them than they do to the one that's guilty.
Alissa and I were talking about this during our habitual morning walk this morning. We really resemble our parents in so many ways. The foods we buy, who to vote for, the style we wear. Everything. Don't get my wrong, Laura and AJ will make great parents. I've learned that a child who grows up in a calm, and supportive environment with no yelling surrounding them, tends to be less aggravated, or irritated with life when they grow up.
Anywho, if you're wondering what the baby's name is, you got me. We just call it Baby Johnson.
Alissa and I were talking about this during our habitual morning walk this morning. We really resemble our parents in so many ways. The foods we buy, who to vote for, the style we wear. Everything. Don't get my wrong, Laura and AJ will make great parents. I've learned that a child who grows up in a calm, and supportive environment with no yelling surrounding them, tends to be less aggravated, or irritated with life when they grow up.
Anywho, if you're wondering what the baby's name is, you got me. We just call it Baby Johnson.
7.21.2007
The truth about Southeners...
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissy fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
_____
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
_____
Only a Southerner can show or point out to y ou the general direction of "yonder."
_____
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, . as in: "Going to town, be back directly."
_____
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
_____
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
_____
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
_____
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
_____
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
____ _
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
_____
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
_____
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're "in line," . we talk to everybody!
_____
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
_____
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
_____
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
_____
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
_____
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
_____
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way.
_____
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
_____
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!
_____
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
_____
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
_____
Only a Southerner can show or point out to y ou the general direction of "yonder."
_____
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, . as in: "Going to town, be back directly."
_____
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
_____
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
_____
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
_____
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
_____
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
____ _
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
_____
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
_____
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're "in line," . we talk to everybody!
_____
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
_____
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
_____
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
_____
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
_____
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
_____
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go your own way.
_____
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
_____
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!
_____
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Why can't we be friends?
Do you ever wonder why people run late sometimes? Traffic, weather blah blah blah. "I'm on my way" is the same thing as "the check is in the mail." Believe me, I've heard that one more than once. I ended up going to the beach later than expected because everything around me was running late. However in the end, it was worth it. I even got some color on my face which faded by this morning. haha
Jim called his sister this afternoon to see if this kid is ever going to pop into this world. Her doctor told her it would be any day now. That was two weeks ago. If the baby doesn't come before the 29th, then they will induce her, or in Jim's words, "force it out." I told him I don't appreciate him describing our nephew as poo. Force is out. haha.
It's a little sad that we probably won't be close to our nephew since Jim's sister isn't nice to us. In fact, she's not nice to anyone. Jim told my dad that, "she's just a bitchy person. She doesn't have any girlfriends." (I know I'm venting frustration, but this is my blog, so I'm going to say it like it is). He told me the other night that I should be the "bigger person." Then he paused, started to laugh and said, "you can't!" When I finally got the joke I was in hysterics. (She's a big girl, which is probably more than half her problem). I'm just learning how to stay out his family feud. I suggest to him to call his family once a week. "I don't feel like getting yelled at right now," is his reply. Sad huh?
When I was little I always imagined getting married and being best buds with my sister-in-law. We would go shopping, get manicures, and lie on the beach sipping cosmos while reading a trashing gossip magazine. I guess I have a vivid imagination.
Anyway, we're going to Walmart tonight to pick up a bed frame which broke on our bed. NO! YOU PERV! His sister actually broke it. Not recently, but awhile ago. Our friends think she should really pay for it, but we know they're on a tight budget, have a kid on the way and just moved back in with her mom. So we're not going to ask.
Current Music: Dixie Chicks I'm Not Ready to Make Nice
Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting
I'm through, with doubt,
There's nothing left for me to figure out,
I've paid a price, and i'll keep paying
I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should
I know you said
Why can't you just get over it,
It turned my whole world around
and i kind of like it
I made by bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
That a mother will teach her daughter
that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over
Chorus.
Jim called his sister this afternoon to see if this kid is ever going to pop into this world. Her doctor told her it would be any day now. That was two weeks ago. If the baby doesn't come before the 29th, then they will induce her, or in Jim's words, "force it out." I told him I don't appreciate him describing our nephew as poo. Force is out. haha.
It's a little sad that we probably won't be close to our nephew since Jim's sister isn't nice to us. In fact, she's not nice to anyone. Jim told my dad that, "she's just a bitchy person. She doesn't have any girlfriends." (I know I'm venting frustration, but this is my blog, so I'm going to say it like it is). He told me the other night that I should be the "bigger person." Then he paused, started to laugh and said, "you can't!" When I finally got the joke I was in hysterics. (She's a big girl, which is probably more than half her problem). I'm just learning how to stay out his family feud. I suggest to him to call his family once a week. "I don't feel like getting yelled at right now," is his reply. Sad huh?
When I was little I always imagined getting married and being best buds with my sister-in-law. We would go shopping, get manicures, and lie on the beach sipping cosmos while reading a trashing gossip magazine. I guess I have a vivid imagination.
Anyway, we're going to Walmart tonight to pick up a bed frame which broke on our bed. NO! YOU PERV! His sister actually broke it. Not recently, but awhile ago. Our friends think she should really pay for it, but we know they're on a tight budget, have a kid on the way and just moved back in with her mom. So we're not going to ask.
Current Music: Dixie Chicks I'm Not Ready to Make Nice
Forgive, sounds good.
Forget, I'm not sure I could.
They say time heals everything,
But I'm still waiting
I'm through, with doubt,
There's nothing left for me to figure out,
I've paid a price, and i'll keep paying
I'm not ready to make nice,
I'm not ready to back down,
I'm still mad as hell
And I don't have time
To go round and round and round
It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should
I know you said
Why can't you just get over it,
It turned my whole world around
and i kind of like it
I made by bed, and I sleep like a baby,
With no regrets and I don't mind saying,
It's a sad sad story
That a mother will teach her daughter
that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.
And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over
Chorus.
7.20.2007
Bills
My happiness wore off quickly when I woke up this morning. It was still raining, so my girlfriend and I decided not to run this morning and to just meet up again on Monday. Blah. I feel like a fat loca porka at the moment.
So for the record, I just want to say that I hate paying bills. It's like they are running my life at the moment. Why can't I just receive a nice greeting card in the mail every once in awhile instead of a habitual bill. Grr. It's like every company that I pay knows how to piss me off. I think Aaron feels the same way. We got home last night and the first thing we do is finalize money and bill stuff. Sad huh? However watching an episode of Firefly always cheers me up.
The sun is finally out, and my girlfriend should be here to lay out with me in two hours. Happy weekend!
So for the record, I just want to say that I hate paying bills. It's like they are running my life at the moment. Why can't I just receive a nice greeting card in the mail every once in awhile instead of a habitual bill. Grr. It's like every company that I pay knows how to piss me off. I think Aaron feels the same way. We got home last night and the first thing we do is finalize money and bill stuff. Sad huh? However watching an episode of Firefly always cheers me up.
The sun is finally out, and my girlfriend should be here to lay out with me in two hours. Happy weekend!
"Put it on the fridge!"
I'm so happy right now that I can't possibly think about sleep even though I have to get up in six hours. I'm in wedding and event planning school in order to become a professional planner. I had to turn in a research paper in that included 3 interviews I had to do with different vendors, a press release, and a research/marketing strategy I would take on when I have my own business. My mentor gave me a 98% on it. I feel like a little school girl who runs home to her mom when she did well on a test. Aaron told me to post it on the fridge. I remember my mom always putting papers on our fridge. I think it gives you an extra boost in this world to do well when you see your accomplishments.
I learned something tonight: When you go into Lynn, the city of sin, don't bring your Burberry umbrella. Even though it was raining, I could have easily worn a hoodie. People on the streets look at you funny, knowing you don't belong there. I was there to help my friend Amanda out in a parade she was in. We got to see Miss Massachusetts which was awesome. The best part was it was pouring and we got soaked. I felt so free. We went back to her apartment and ordered pizza. I ate four slices. FOUR! Good God, I feel fat. We reluctantly decided to watch Father of the Bride until Aaron came and picked me up after he got off work.
Tomorrow I'm going to the beach with a good friend. I'm so grateful that we live about two blocks away from the beach because I love the beach. Anyway, we're going to lay out and get some color...if this rain ever goes away.
I learned something tonight: When you go into Lynn, the city of sin, don't bring your Burberry umbrella. Even though it was raining, I could have easily worn a hoodie. People on the streets look at you funny, knowing you don't belong there. I was there to help my friend Amanda out in a parade she was in. We got to see Miss Massachusetts which was awesome. The best part was it was pouring and we got soaked. I felt so free. We went back to her apartment and ordered pizza. I ate four slices. FOUR! Good God, I feel fat. We reluctantly decided to watch Father of the Bride until Aaron came and picked me up after he got off work.
Tomorrow I'm going to the beach with a good friend. I'm so grateful that we live about two blocks away from the beach because I love the beach. Anyway, we're going to lay out and get some color...if this rain ever goes away.
7.18.2007
What so Important?
I was going to express my appreciation on how my husband taught me how to talk about my feelings last night. I'm the type of person that if something happens, I feel like I can play God and make the world a better place. That's so far from the truth. I am not God, and I can't go and save the world at all. Something happened to my parents yesterday that I'm still too prideful to write so the whole world can read. At least I'm admitting to it right?
Last night I learned how to talk to one of my girlfriends about my problems and feel like someone not judging me for once. So here's what's bugging me today, and forgive me if it seems like a bunch of nonsense because it's all scrambled in my head. AHH!
I feel left out sometimes. It's no ones fault at all. It's me. I'm so overly sensitive about things at times it's really pathetic. I feel like people are hiding things from me, and for what reason? I don't get mad that often. Maybe I'm just paranoid. I mean if something drastic happened to one of my friends, or their love life I'm sure they would tell me. But I feel like they wouldn't. I think I'm getting cabin fever. It's been a rainy day, and it's extremely foggy outside now. My husband got into an accident last week so we only have one car, which means he's at work at the moment and I'm here. Alone, and nothing to do because I'm unemployed.
I feel bad about not having a job. It really sucks. I feel bad for Jim to have the responsibility to be the provider for our family. I wish I could help out somehow. I'm trying. It's not like I sit on my ass all day and eat bon-bons. I just had an interview last week. Plus, I'm in the midst of getting my event and wedding planning license.
I just need to get out of here and go somewhere. Florida sounds nice....
Last night I learned how to talk to one of my girlfriends about my problems and feel like someone not judging me for once. So here's what's bugging me today, and forgive me if it seems like a bunch of nonsense because it's all scrambled in my head. AHH!
I feel left out sometimes. It's no ones fault at all. It's me. I'm so overly sensitive about things at times it's really pathetic. I feel like people are hiding things from me, and for what reason? I don't get mad that often. Maybe I'm just paranoid. I mean if something drastic happened to one of my friends, or their love life I'm sure they would tell me. But I feel like they wouldn't. I think I'm getting cabin fever. It's been a rainy day, and it's extremely foggy outside now. My husband got into an accident last week so we only have one car, which means he's at work at the moment and I'm here. Alone, and nothing to do because I'm unemployed.
I feel bad about not having a job. It really sucks. I feel bad for Jim to have the responsibility to be the provider for our family. I wish I could help out somehow. I'm trying. It's not like I sit on my ass all day and eat bon-bons. I just had an interview last week. Plus, I'm in the midst of getting my event and wedding planning license.
I just need to get out of here and go somewhere. Florida sounds nice....
7.17.2007
Hello My name is Erin...
....and I'm not an alcoholic. I'm sure that's a great way of introducing myself to people who read this that I may not know, or even meet in this lifetime. (Not that I think I'm going to have another one). When I think of myself, I would say I'm extremely independent. Maybe too independent. My mom always thought I was. I came out of the womb with a checklist I had to accomplish for the day. My husband thinks I'm independent as well, but likes it on occasion. He's so good to me, and I love him more than tomorrow but less than yesterday. We've been married seven months, and if someone had to ask me if the first year of marriage is hard, I would bluntly say yes. It completely sucks. However it's worth it. We didn't live together before we were married so we came into it just playing house, and learning things about each other that we both didn't notice during the dating period. My mom told me at least a billion times, "what irritates you now will only irritate you 10 times more when you're married." I'm finding that more true everyday. But it's still worth it.
We have a wonderful roommate as well. I know to some it may seem odd, but to us it's completely normal and I see all three of us as a little family most of the time. We bicker, laugh, cry, pay bills, and are completely not perfect in any sorts, but not fake. We'll say what we're thinking and not sugar coat anything. He's like the big brother I never had.
Being the southener I am, or being raised by other southeners I have that class of southern hospitality. I love giving to people. Someone told be that they know I would give the clothes off my back for them if they needed it. I took that as a compliment.
Today is turning out to be a terrible Tuesday. I say this because my Monday wasn't manic at all. I went to a park with my husband and roommate and we walked barely over 3 miles around a lake observing people and the many fire posts and the dogs. It was fun. It was good exercise because I'm training myself for a 5k run I'm doing in Orlando on Aug. 11th with my parents next door neighbors who I practically grew up with, the Jones. And yes, I'll be able to keep up with them, or at least the 11 year old. That's going to be a busy day. The run at 7.30am and then attending a baby shower for one of my girlfriend's in Cassleberry at 11.00am. This showers is sounding more and more huge every time I hear about it. A caterer, the place, the flowers. Just like a wedding.
I can't believe how many of my girlfriends just in the past 2 months have gotten pregnant. Granted one of them has been married for 4 years now. But wow. These are girls I sat next to in the first grade. Traded lunches with in the cafe, learned those "Miss Sally" hand games on the recess field, and watched the miracle of life movie with in the 7th grade. Don't get my wrong, I'm not bitter in the least! I love my life. I'm having fun. I'm so happy for all of them! They completely deserve it, and I know they all will be fantastic mothers. I'm going to be an aunt any day now, which is where all my excitement is going. When I am ready to have kids, probably by 2010, I want twins. I know it probably won't happen, but that's ok. I would love 2 girls and a boy. In no particular order. I always wanted that. I remember writing down names to for my children on a little napkin when I was about 6. I wonder where that napkin is now.
The only thing about kids is taking them to a restaurant. My parents didn't take me anywhere until I was 3, and made sure I had my crayons and to-go cup. But seriously, I was catching up with one of my girlfriends, Sharon whom I haven't seen in awhile, (no she's not knocked up). The whole time this kid would sporadically scream a sound of murder from the booth next to us. For God's sake, hire an effin baby-sitter. I'm sure some 13 year old around the neighborhood would love to earn a few extra bucks for the day. I knew I did at that age. I have just realized the inflation cost of baby-sitting. I used to probably make $6.00 an hour. My sister baby-sits and she makes about $8.00. Where were these people when I was on the job? I did nanny 3 kids during my senior year of high school up until I received my A.A. from the local community college in Orlando. It was extremely good money. Even though I was still living with my parents, I was able to save up. They were bratty, but I loved them. One time we were in Payless getting the little boy new shoes for school, and some lady came up to me and said, "you look really good for having three kids." SIDE NOTE: the oldest at the time was 9. Ok, first of all, do I look that old? And second of all, thanks! I was a size 2 back then. Now I'm a 4/6 respectfully.
I know today is going to end well. I just need to lean on God for his strength.
We have a wonderful roommate as well. I know to some it may seem odd, but to us it's completely normal and I see all three of us as a little family most of the time. We bicker, laugh, cry, pay bills, and are completely not perfect in any sorts, but not fake. We'll say what we're thinking and not sugar coat anything. He's like the big brother I never had.
Being the southener I am, or being raised by other southeners I have that class of southern hospitality. I love giving to people. Someone told be that they know I would give the clothes off my back for them if they needed it. I took that as a compliment.
Today is turning out to be a terrible Tuesday. I say this because my Monday wasn't manic at all. I went to a park with my husband and roommate and we walked barely over 3 miles around a lake observing people and the many fire posts and the dogs. It was fun. It was good exercise because I'm training myself for a 5k run I'm doing in Orlando on Aug. 11th with my parents next door neighbors who I practically grew up with, the Jones. And yes, I'll be able to keep up with them, or at least the 11 year old. That's going to be a busy day. The run at 7.30am and then attending a baby shower for one of my girlfriend's in Cassleberry at 11.00am. This showers is sounding more and more huge every time I hear about it. A caterer, the place, the flowers. Just like a wedding.
I can't believe how many of my girlfriends just in the past 2 months have gotten pregnant. Granted one of them has been married for 4 years now. But wow. These are girls I sat next to in the first grade. Traded lunches with in the cafe, learned those "Miss Sally" hand games on the recess field, and watched the miracle of life movie with in the 7th grade. Don't get my wrong, I'm not bitter in the least! I love my life. I'm having fun. I'm so happy for all of them! They completely deserve it, and I know they all will be fantastic mothers. I'm going to be an aunt any day now, which is where all my excitement is going. When I am ready to have kids, probably by 2010, I want twins. I know it probably won't happen, but that's ok. I would love 2 girls and a boy. In no particular order. I always wanted that. I remember writing down names to for my children on a little napkin when I was about 6. I wonder where that napkin is now.
The only thing about kids is taking them to a restaurant. My parents didn't take me anywhere until I was 3, and made sure I had my crayons and to-go cup. But seriously, I was catching up with one of my girlfriends, Sharon whom I haven't seen in awhile, (no she's not knocked up). The whole time this kid would sporadically scream a sound of murder from the booth next to us. For God's sake, hire an effin baby-sitter. I'm sure some 13 year old around the neighborhood would love to earn a few extra bucks for the day. I knew I did at that age. I have just realized the inflation cost of baby-sitting. I used to probably make $6.00 an hour. My sister baby-sits and she makes about $8.00. Where were these people when I was on the job? I did nanny 3 kids during my senior year of high school up until I received my A.A. from the local community college in Orlando. It was extremely good money. Even though I was still living with my parents, I was able to save up. They were bratty, but I loved them. One time we were in Payless getting the little boy new shoes for school, and some lady came up to me and said, "you look really good for having three kids." SIDE NOTE: the oldest at the time was 9. Ok, first of all, do I look that old? And second of all, thanks! I was a size 2 back then. Now I'm a 4/6 respectfully.
I know today is going to end well. I just need to lean on God for his strength.
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